Tuesday, February 27, 2007

What makes us tick

On February 20, 1967, Kurt Cobain was born. I liked him. I liked how he ran INTO his music. I liked how he was down to earth...hung with his friends. I liked how in 1986, Nirvana didn't cause him to sit in some ivory tower somewhere. Even AFTER 1991 when the instantly infamous Nevermind was released and picked up by the suburban, consumer, wannabe punk masses, Kurt still wore a tatty grey cardigan half the time, not some tailor-made yellow monstrocity the likes of what Prince wore recently in public.
Wikipedia has this on Cobain...worth the read. I'll wait here for you. Come back because I have a thought I need you to chew over with me.

In the article about Cobain, the "suicide dispute" mentions a guy named El Duce.
El Duce, (real name Eldon Hoke) was born on March 24 1958 in Seattle Washington USA. That's where Kurt lived and grew up.
Read this Wikipedia bit on Eldon ( El Duce) Hoke. DISCLAIMER: I THINK EL DUCE WAS A SCUM BAG ! (go ahead and nail me on a judgement call) If you venture to look for info about him, you may very well agree...
Read it, I'll wait.

I had a friend I'll call "Fred". Fred and I ran neck and neck in illegal petty nonsence and could out drink any comers any time. Fred did any dope you gave him. I did plenty of dope, but few chemicals, we differed here. Fred was 6' 5" and FULL of biker attitude. Fred would often approach the dangerous point of OD almost weekly. Fred drank a 60 ounce bottle of Vodka one night with hot Neo- Citran as mix and didn't die. I was there and couldn't beleive that he could function. Fred beat up a 72 year old Asian man one night. The man weighed about 99 pounds. I wasn't there. But I went to his court case.
Fred would often need penicillin. Fred couldn't be trusted around women.
I loved him for the most part, but we parted ways. I didn't like who he became. We no longer ran neck and neck. Fred was out there. He was dangerous.
Fred died from a heroin/valium overdose just shy of 30 years old.
Have I succeeded in painting a picture of character? Fred and El Duce?
Good, here's my question:
Why do some people end up literally, the scum of humanity?
Fred came from a safe, well-off home. His mum loved and supported him.
I saw an interview with El Duce. He was bad...and was proud of it.
Does God, faith, religion play a part in this?
Social conditioning?
I often think of Kurt. I think he was a nice enough guy. I met him VERY briefly and he didn't seem like "a bad man". Maybe I'm wrong.
So today, as I thought of Kurt Cobain, I was reminded of El Duce...and Fred.

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Saturday, February 24, 2007

moody




Our kitten, Quasimodo, was born in September 2006. He doesn't know it yet, but he's getting neutered at the end of this month. When my doctor neutered me a year ago, my personality didn't change, my sex drive didn't change, however, I think my beard grows slower... Anyway, we're hoping Quasi WILL CHANGE and slow down a bit after his "snip". Presently, he lurks around the house in the shadows and pounces at your feet as you pass by. He bites your toes when you sit and nips your nose when you sleep. When the youth come here on Thursday evenings, some nervously ask where he is before they sit down. He's been known to launch from the chairs to the backs of their heads. In the wee hours, we hear him running around full speed as if he's being chased by monsters...perhaps he is, I don't look under my bed anymore. But the latest "trait" he's been exploring, and it's kinda nasty, is alien sex.
Pj has this stuffed alien doll, she's had it for quite some time, but Quasi has adopted the little guy as his own. Now and then, as the mood strikes him, Quasi drags him into the living room, mounts the defenseless creature, bites his foot, and places his yet-to-be-neutered parts on his face.
Sometimes he gyrates like a fat, tired Elvis Presley. But mostly he just dribbles and sucks the foot while maintaining a distant, far away look in his one good eye. We were thinking of chucking the alien, but we don't like to imagine what Quasi would conquer in it's absence...
4 days left li'l buddy...and alien sex will be a distant, foreign memory from a galaxy far, far away. So far in fact,Kittyagra won't even be able to help you.

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Friday, February 23, 2007

if you believe in peanut butter....

Product recalls don't usually excite me, but this caught my attention. Officials with the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention have confirmed the presence of salmonella in peanut butter jars. In fact. the U.S. Food and Drug Administration last week recalled jars of Peter Pan peanut butter purchased since May 11 along with Wal-Mart's Great Value peanut butter. (product code on the lid begins with the number 2111.)
This is where I get thinking along my typical I-HATE-WAL-MART path.
The jars were made by ConAgra in a single facility in Sylvester, Ga., the FDA said. Government and industry officials say dirty jars or equipment may have contaminated the jars.
What's MY point? A top selling peanut butter, Peter Pan, is made IN THE SAME FACILITY as Wal-Mart product. I wonder if any of my American blog-buddies would mind pricing them out for me...I'm terribly curious. Perhaps you would compare the ingredients, price etc. of the two products.
I remember a Mad Magazine comic strip showing a guy moaning about the higher price he pays for premium gasoline. Below ground, they showed the two pumps, with different fuel grades, coming from the same tank...
Is this Wal-Mart product good, or is Peter Pan peanut butter nothing more than over-sugared, low-end Wal-Mart quality?

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Tuesday, February 20, 2007

football


And so it continues....UEFA Champions League 2006/07
C'mon Liverpool FC
you'll never walk alone....
UP THE REDS !!!!!





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Really?

Sexualisation 'harms' young girls.
The media's portrayal of young women as sex objects harms girls' mental and physical health, US experts warn.

Magazines, television, video games and music videos all have a detrimental effect, a task force from the American Psychological Association reported.
Sexualisation can lead to a lack of confidence with their bodies as well as depression and eating disorders.
Such images also have a negative effect on healthy sexual development in girls, the researchers said.
The task force was set up after mounting
"public concern" about the sexualisation of young girls.


EXAMPLES OF SEXUALISATION
Young pop stars dressed as sex objects
Dolls aimed at young girls with sexual clothing such as fishnet tights
Clothing, such as thongs, for seven to 10-year-olds
Adult models dressed as young girls
Research on the content and effects of television, music videos, music lyrics, magazines, films, video games and the internet was analysed.
Recent advertising campaigns and merchandising of products aimed at girls was also scrutinised.


Sexualisation was defined as occurring when a person's value comes only from her or his sexual appeal or behaviour, to the exclusion of other characteristics, and when a person is portrayed purely as a sex object.
They gave examples of a trainer advert that featured pop star Christina Aguilera dressed as a schoolgirl with her shirt unbuttoned, licking a lollipop.
According to the research identified by the task force, such images and promotion of girls as sexual objects negatively affects young girls in many ways.
We need to replace all of these sexualised images with ones showing girls in positive settings - ones that show the uniqueness and competence of girls Dr Eileen Zurbriggen Task force chair
"The consequences of the sexualisation of girls in media today are very real," said Dr Eileen Zurbriggen, chair of the group and associate professor of psychology at the University of California, Santa Cruz.
"We have ample evidence to conclude that sexualisation has negative effects in a variety of domains, including cognitive functioning, physical and mental health, and healthy sexual development."
The task force called on parents, school officials, and health professionals to be alert for the potential impact on girls and young women.
And it advised that schools should teach pupils media literacy skills and should include information on the negative effects of images portraying girls as sex objects in sex education programmes.
Governments also had a responsibility to reduce the use of sexualised images in the media and advertising, they said.
Teenage magazines
Dr Zurbriggen added: "As a society, we need to replace all of these sexualised images with ones showing girls in positive settings - ones that show the uniqueness and competence of girls.
"The goal should be to deliver messages to all adolescents - boys and girls - that lead to healthy sexual development."
Professor Andrew Hill, professor of medical psychology at the University of Leeds, said it was hard to disagree with any of the reports conclusions.
"If you look at teenage magazines, it's all about sex.
"We are a visually absorbed society - our views of people are dominated by how they look."
He added that the use of women as sex objects in the media and advertising was a difficult issue to deal with.
"Only 18% of children's television viewing is in their designated viewing time and legislation can't be the answer for everything.
"One of the key things here is social responsibility - advertisers and other media need to be aware that the products they produce and images associated with them have an impact and it's not always a good impact," he said.

From BBC
Also, look here for a story about a company that (innocently) sexually exploits children for profit.

My daughter is right at NO ADDED SUGAR's targeted age group. I thank Jesus daily, so far, she hasn't become obsessed with make-up and slutty clothing or "body image". This hopeless, depressing, unattainable physical appearence that Hollywood, MTV and catalogue "images" puts forth should be outlawed. The Puppet is fit, active, happy and dresses like a
surf/skater. I'm fine with anything she wears that isn't birthed from parasites like NO ADDED SUGAR. I think most of her good "self esteem" stems from her mum's good body image. Pj doesn't care about the lies put forth by cosmetic scum like M.A.C or L'Oreal Paris. She isn't obsessed with getting down to a size zero or getting her boobs up to a D cup. I feel sad for some women that have totally followed and fully believe the lie that they are beautiful only AFTER they've trowelled on make up and altered their bodies. The only thing sadder, is the shallow men that insist their women "shape up" or that they cake the poison on their faces. If husbands and boyfriends like make up and perfume so much, let THEM wear it!
Now, before you slit me with razors and roll me in salt and vinegar, let me add something.
If you, as a mature woman, WANT to use cosmetics, perfumes and other various artificial items to "feel" pretty, go ahead. But please, don't help these bastards brainwash your daughters by appearing "ugly" in front of them. Don't panic if you've gained 7 pounds. Don't run and hide if someone comes to call when " you haven't put your face on." But most importantly, tell your young daughters often, that they're beautiful just as they are. Even more importantly, DADS TELL YOUR GIRLS THIS TRUTH!
Here is a glimpse into the sales of a product that isn't really needed...the sales of the L'Oréal group, at December 31st 2006, amounted to 15.79 billion euros. That would be 20.73 billion US dollars. They don't need your help! But your daughter, sister, friend might.

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Monday, February 19, 2007

winter






































Pj has a new hobby called Geocaching. Look
here to find out more. Here in Alberta this time of year, everything is frozen...so caching is only a dream quest. Once spring/summer arrives, we'll be in top gear!! We're actually standing ON the Red Deer river!

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Thursday, February 15, 2007

Freedom to choose

My Bible has the words of Christ in red. I imagine the publishers wanted to be certain we wouldn't miss His words. Why couldn't the publishers pick some other colour for His words? Red is a caution colour. I equate red with "danger". Perhaps to some, the words of Christ do in fact equal danger. I've had my bible for years...and I read it! The red bits don't worry me.
I've used the colour red in this blog as an attention getting type of device. A red light if you will. In nature, red is potentially dangerous. In televangelism, I think everything should be done in red. That way, the veiwing public (victim) might be a little more leary. Perhaps they'd be cautious, very cautious before proceeding.
Along with the often embarrased red faces of the host preachers, they could sport red suits and dresses. They could use red stages with red props and red lighting...
I don't recall where I lifted this...cbc me thinks... Yes, click here.
I'm linking the home page of the Miracle Channel here, but please, if you're a praying human...be certain that you pray before you visit it.

A Christian television channel that was rebuked for encouraging viewers to donate their retirement savings is looking to expand its viewership in Alberta.
The owners of the Lethbridge-based Miracle Channel, which is carried on cable, have applied for the right to set up transmitters in Calgary and Edmonton, which, if approved, would make the channel available for free to viewers in both cities.
Appearing in front of a Canadian Radio-television and Telecommunications Commission on Monday, station representatives were questioned about statements made by an on-air host during a fundraising drive in 2004 when he asked viewers to cash in their RRSPs for donations.
The channel's president, Dick Dewert, said Monday that the channel has since worked with the CRTC to create a new internal fundraising policy.
"From time to time, we get questions about different statements that were made on the stations," added Gordon Klassen, vice-president of the Miracle Channel.
"We abide by internal fundraising policies and the ethics guidelines and of course the religious broadcasting policy, and we would work well with commission staff to make sure we are within those guidelines."
Former Saskatchewan donor and ordained minister Tim Thibault, a vocal critic of the station who filed a complaint about statements made during past fundraising drives, wants to stop the expansion.
"The people that they appeal to are vulnerable viewers," Thibault said.
"We've found that every market the Miracle Channel has gone into, the number of people that contact us with concerns and questions about their fundraising methods has increased," he claimed.
The CRTC isn't expecting to announce its decision on the Miracle Channel's application for at least three months.
'God's speaking to you to cash those in'
A complaint by Thibault led the CRTC to investigate the station's November 2004 and March 2005 fundraising campaigns.
"There is somebody right now watching and God is speaking to them about RRSPs," a host said in 2004. "They've got RRSPs and they've got a sizable amount and it's a security thing. Well, it's not a security thing; your security is in God. And God's speaking to you to cash those in. I dare you to do it."
According to CRTC records, a host also said of a woman who put a
$5,000 donation on a credit card: "And we believe that God is going to give that back to you and you are going to be able to pay it off real fast."
In January 2006, the CRTC found that the statements "placed an undue responsibility on the viewer to respond to the appeal," contravening the policy on ethics for religious programming.
Others were inconsistent with the guidelines because they "predicted divine consequences of not responding, or exaggerated positive results of responding."
"Donations to a religious programming service cannot, to the best of staff's knowledge, cure nicotine addictions or cancer, spur immediate financial success or enable the quicker repayment of outstanding debts," wrote the CRTC's Martine Vallee in her decision.
In 2005, supporters donated nearly $4 million, which went mostly to creating the station's programs, with the rest going to other charities, including the church inside the station and other evangelical ministries.
The channel is expected to bring in about $7.5 million in donations this year.


If you donate $1000 to the Miracle Channel right now, they'll send you a vial of "Abba Anointing Oil"
That's right, don't delay, act now! This stuff is Biblical, it has to be. They've added a verse to back up the need for the product.
Now, where's my cheque book?
Even when I walk through the darkest valley, I will not be afraid, for you are close beside me. Your rod and your staff protect and comfort me. You prepare a feast for me in the presence of my enemies. You honor me by anointing my head with oil. My cup overflows with blessings. Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me all the days of my life, and I will live in the house of the Lord forever. Psalm 23

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Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Love day



















I lifted this "review" of Valentine's day from
this site.
The photos, are of your's truly doing up a full English breakfast for Pj. Happy V-day love!


The primary motive behind Valentines is money. And plenty of it!

Hallmark is cleverly cashing in on the sales of Valentines Day
greeting cards. The same with people who sell flowers, Candy and cute
cuddly bears. They all do this under the guise of something called
Love.
They do this while making single people feel sad, degrading them.
Society forces you to feel inadequate and less of a person because you
are not involved in a "relationship". They alienate you because you
choose to be celibate. They ostracize you because you are content with
a romantic less relationship. They surround you with sickening
displays of kissing, cupids, hearts, and public displays of affection
until it forces you to puke!
Valentines has a bad effect on the general population of the human
race. For example, instead of pleasantly surprising someone you care.
People now expect gifts to be exchanged in a Valentine's ritual.
Giving gifts to make someone feel special should have personal motives
(motives of honestly trying to make that person feel good) not a
ritual because society and people around you expect it.
When it comes down to it Valentines is a overrated
a overrated capitalistic invention by Hallmark to make money with sick
side affects of lowering self-esteem of many individuals.

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Monday, February 12, 2007

fooooood











Years ago, I was with a friend who usually spent most of his cash on crack cocaine before food. This day, he was a bit hungry. We stopped at a cornerstone so he could buy a bag of chips. He didn't need much usually. He bought a scratch and win lottery ticket too. He won $50 and shouted that lunch was on him! ( one thing you need to know about people who abuse crack...they have hearts too, they just forget the fact) So, he said we were going to his favorite place that was just around the corner.
Kent's Kitchen is in the bitter end of Vancouver's Chinatown.
Rave reviews:

Chinese take-out, dozens of varieties. Foodies be warned; emphasis on quantity, and not necessarily quality. Fried Garlic Shrimp, sweet and sour pork, honey garlic spareribs, mixed tofu and mushroom, the works. Past incidents with the Heath Inspectors a bit unsettling. Anyhow, if you don't mind it, you're single, and have a strong immune system, this is the place to go to grab cheap eats to take home.

$5 lunch its big good and cheap
Look for the free soup at the end of the counter. I was here 5 times then someone told me about the soup. This is Chinese steam table. line up with your money in hand( people with cash in hand get served first in Chinatown). Point at what you like, some of them speak English.

I love this place! I've eaten there 50 times over the years and try to go there whenever we get back to Vancouver to visit friends and family. I've never been ill afterwards! My favorites include Pork Stomach, Tripe, Cuttlefish, Octopus,and various unknown entrails in sauces. No, I'm not trying to make YOU ill, I'm simply trying to set the menu.These are the items I "point to". They also offer traditional dishes like Sweet and Sour Pork, Chow Mein, Ginger Beef etc...
Pj took a shot of me enjoying some Octopus with Percy in some other establishment, but I think it fits here too.
The puppet has Chow Mein.


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Saturday, February 10, 2007

grub


Forget waffles or pancakes...nothing can really beat a full English breakfast! The only bit missing in this image, is Blood pudding, or blood sausage. Fresh pork sausage could do in a pinch. However, blood sausage lends a certain something to the overall meal. If it was good enough for Homer to mention in his Odyssey, it's good enough for me!

"As when a man besides a great fire has filled a sausage with fat and blood and turns it this way and that and is very eager to get it quickly roasted..."

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Friday, February 09, 2007

divorce

Care to comment? Lots here...

http://www.cbc.ca/canada/story/2007/02/09/court-deadbeat.html

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Thursday, February 08, 2007

Tissue anyone?


Psychological question of the day:

Why do people get offended so easily?


My blog, and others, continue to get people riled up so quickly. Why not offer a rebuttle to something you've read and disagree with? Why not offer "the other side" of the topic instead of a blunt "you suck!"? Why not try and "toughen up" a bit, or is it really all about you?

It seems to me, that some people are becoming ever more fragile and delicate within themselves...perhaps they should try getting their strength and "self-worth" from some other source. Obviously, for them, their current program isn't cutting it.

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Wednesday, February 07, 2007

moaning

All right, I must be in a real mood! After reading this page about students and tuition, my dander is up!
I've been digging Jesus for 17 years. Of those years, I've spent time with youth groups in churches , street kids in cities, young prostitutes and drug users in Government foster homes and regular "good kids" in my various neibourhoods over the years. I have no degrees...what I DO have, is 17 years of hands on experience! So, who is it perpetuating the need for BA's and other degrees? A place in Vancouver called The Wander Inn wouldn't hire me or allow me to be a volunteer without a degree. Imagine that, the administrative head of The Wander Inn told me I needed a bit of paper before I could hug a kid and tell him Jesus loves him... 4 years of school and thousands of dollars in tuition and I'd be in. Woe to you!
But the real thing that gets me as far as these students go, is this: Why do you think you should get a free ride?

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hmmmmphhh

What do you do for fun? We all need some "downtime" now and then, it's healthy. Think about it, what do you do for fun? I was pondering this on my way in to work today.
What do I do for fun?
I don't do much! I don't have anything scheduled each week or month. I'm beginning to see that this is in no way a healthy way to live.
I had a few lads over several weeks ago for a beer tasting night...THAT was fun. I'm thinking I should have a weekly thing to do that is fun though. I don't really have any hobbies.
Do you have hobbies? What do you enjoy?
I enjoy a quiet beer and cigar, the problem with this activity, is the cold outdoor temperatures....so I don't even have 1 cigar a month. Not really a hobby.
My motorbike is frozen to the ground....
I think I'm just angry at the moment! That, and the fact that I'm not really having much fun!

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Tuesday, February 06, 2007

chilly willy




I noticed it was kinda chilly today. It was only about -13 degrees celcius/ 8 degrees Fahrenheit, but the wind made it FEEL colder! These two Hutterite guys picked up stuff from where I work. They're from the Staulville Colony not far from me. Wearing wool suits is the way to go in this weather....

Work in the oil patch stops for nothing! I saw this crew in the early stages of their work. It was very windy here.

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Monday, February 05, 2007

Dump run



I often go to the local dump to scrounge firewood for my wood stove home heating endeavors. 6 years ago, while rummaging through the wood pile, I was attacked by a large cat. I didn't see him come at me. He doesn't come 'round every time I'm there (weekly), but I feel him watching me. I know he's out there somewhere. He chased my dog one Saturday, from one end of the dump to the other. I think he wants to play, but he's mangy looking and quick moving, best to be cautious. I had to literally kick him off my dog one day too. I've named him "Dumpcat" because I'm fond of him. I didn't think he'd survive when I first saw him. His eye was puss filled, his tail was a blood scabbed nub, his ear was torn and he made muffled meow sounds. Not to mention the minus 30-odd degree celcius winters here or the plus 30 degree celcius summers...
He always stalks around and leaps out of nowhere suddenly. Over the years, we've gained a healthy respect for one another. Or should I say, me for him? I can sometimes stroke him these days, but ultimately that's up to him not me. Last Saturday, he was in my truck sitting on the seat. I didn't notice him get in. This time, I had my trusty camera!

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Friday, February 02, 2007

flowing along

So it's Friday finally, I've had a long week. So I'm gonna write about random stuff in the life of Spoke...
I'm eating a gorgeous lasagna that
Take 2 made and dropped off. Thanx D!
I had 13 youth at my home last night for our weekly "bible" study thing. We look at life issues they probably face each day, then we throw the issues at the bible to see how we can fit Jesus into the mix. Really fascinating stuff we look at and discuss in this co-ed 14-17 year old gang. I'm blessed how their folks, my church and the kids themselves trust me. Over the last few weeks, we looked at dating, which turned into a discussion about sex...not technique by any means, but rather, should you indulge? It's amazing how each kid can move their "moral line" around as they see fit. Don't we all?. I love their innocence. When I was their age.....
Most of them have never even kissed a person of the opposite sex! That amazes me in an ecstatic sort of way...how cool of them!
Of course, sex talk lead to pornography talk, which lead to masturbation talk. Remember now, I look at all of this through the pages of the bible, (I beleive the book to be THE truth) which makes it difficult to some degree. People for generations, have misquoted, fragmented and manipulated verses in order to achieve behaviour modification in other people...to control them! So looking at the bible when discussing these things is a challenge because the kids have been bashed before. For instance, imagine using Onan's story in Genesis 38 : 7-10 as a warning about masturbation. Read it people! It's not about that! Don't add to it or invent things that are not there!
Anyway, the kids are a blast, and next Thursday is our monthly potluck. I think they are all bringing pie!
Today, I met Pj for coffee. When we left, I gave her a kiss while standing on the street. Now, in this Holdeman Mennonite-bible belt town, that isn't usually done/seen by people. When I got back to work however, our new receptionist told me how sweet it was that I was "kissing my wife on the street after all these years". Apparently, she went to get the mail and do a bank run and "caught" us.
I'll kiss my wife anywhere, anytime thanx! I suggest you do likewise...or your hubby. These spouses are a gift to us. Be proud!
My daughter,
the Puppet, turns 13 on Monday!!! She wants to do a scavenger hunt on Sunday with her friends, so I'm gonna head that up. I can't believe how quickly that kid is growing, not simply in physique either, but her maturity! Sometimes I want her to be 2 again, but this "stage" is exciting too! Keep blooming love!
Winter is hanging on, it's too cold to ride my cb750 classique, have a Dominican cigar out doors or even pee outdoors! All of these are fun hobbies for me. Come on springtime!
So, there you go, a general boring blog about my life at the moment...this is just the type of blog I usually skip over.....sigh.

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Thursday, February 01, 2007

The ink is black...

I guy at work said something about how Christ "looked". I said that I disagreed with his "image" of Christ.
So, I pulled this from a BBC webpage...

So what colour was Jesus?
By Giles Wilson BBC News Online Magazine
Jesus has been named the top black icon by the New Nation newspaper. Their assertion that Jesus was black has raised eyebrows in some quarters - so what colour was he?
Just as no one will ever produce proof for the existence of God, the question of Jesus's colour may always be a matter for personal belief.
Was he white, white-ish, olive-skinned, swarthy, dark-skinned or black? There are people who believe he was any one of those shades, but there seem to be only two things about the debate that can be said with any degree of certainty.
First - if the past 2,000 years of Western art were the judge, Jesus would be white, handsome, probably with long hair and an ethereal glow.
Second - it can almost certainly be said that Jesus would not have been white. His hair was also probably cut short.
I think the safest thing is to talk about Jesus as 'a man of colour' Dr Mark Goodacre
Yet the notion that Jesus was black - highlighted this week in a survey of black icons by the New Nation newspaper which ranked him at number one - is genuinely held by some. One school of thought has it that Jesus was part of a tribe which had migrated from Nigeria.
And Jesus probably did have some African links - after all the conventional theory is that he lived as a child in Egypt where, presumably, his appearance did not make him stand out.
The New Nation takes it further: "Ethiopian Christianity, which pre-dates European Christianity, always depicts Christ as an African and it generally agreed that people of the region where Jesus came from looked nothing like Boris Johnson," the paper says. As light-hearted evidence that Jesus was black, it adds that he "called everybody 'brother', liked Gospel, and couldn't get a fair trial".
But the truth, says New Testament scholar Dr Mark Goodacre, of the University of Birmingham, is probably somewhere in between.
"There is absolutely no evidence as to what Jesus looked like," he says. "The artistic depictions down the ages have total and complete variation, which indicates that nobody did a portrait of Jesus or wrote down a description, it's all been forgotten."
Traditional depictions
Dr Goodacre was involved in the reconstruction of a Middle Eastern first century skull for the BBC's Son of God programme in 2001, which resulted in a suggestion of what a man like Jesus might have looked like. He advised on hair and skin colour.
"The hair was the easiest - there's a reference in Paul which says it's disgraceful for a man to wear long hair, so it looks pretty sure that people of that period had to have reasonably short hair. The traditional depictions of Jesus with long flowing golden hair are probably inaccurate."
Deciding on skin colour was more difficult, though. But the earliest depictions of Jews, which date from the 3rd Century, are - as far as can be determined - dark-skinned.
"We do seem to have a relatively dark skinned Jesus. In contemporary parlance I think the safest thing is to talk about Jesus as 'a man of colour'." This probably means olive-coloured, he says.
'Fascinating' debate
Professor Vincent Wimbush, of California's Claremont Graduate University, who is an expert on ethnic interpretations of the Bible, says the matter of the historical colour of Jesus seems to him a "flat, dead-end issue".
"He's of Mediterranean stock, and it's quite clear what that means. We see people like that in the world today, and that should end the matter." The fact that the debate rages on regardless is fascinating, he says, because of what it says about people's other issues.
The artistic representations of Jesus which are so familiar are not necessarily a negative thing, Dr Goodacre says. There is "theologically something quite profound" in the fact that throughout history people have tried to depict Jesus in their own image.
"This is not a rough image of themselves people have been depicting. It's an ideal image of themselves, painting Jesus as something they are aspiring to.
"Things have changed a bit in recent culture because people are conscious of the need to be challenged by him and shocked. I think that's why in more contemporary representations, even those coming from a white, western background, people will think very carefully about the representation."
Even the world of film is catching up, albeit slowly. Robert Powell had famously piercing blue eyes in Jesus of Nazareth in 1977. And although Jim Caviezel, who played the lead in Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ, also has piercing blue eyes, by the time the film was shown they had miraculously become brown.
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I've heard that the misconception surrounding the length of Jesus' hair comes from western artists confusing the term "Nazarene", which denotes the hometown of Jesus, with the term "Nazarite" which was a name given to those to took a religious vow to abstain from such things as wine, and from cutting their hair. Doug Jennings, West Dundee, IL US

Does it matter what colour Jesus was? He was Jewish, so would bear the colour of a Middle-eastern person. People like to see icons represented in their own images, so it came about that 'God created man in His image.' That image is open to interpretation according to who the believer is. Patsy Langley, Feltham, Middlesex, England

The MAN was African, no doubt. Revelations reference "for his feet shone like Bronze" says it all. Jazz Vilakazi, Cape Town, South Africa

There is a church in Lucca, Italy that claims to be the most lifelike representation of Jesus on the cross. In this he is clearly dark skinned. I'll go with that option.
Stephen Higgins, Oxford, UK

The whole point of there being no visual record of the appearance of Christ, is that theologically it makes him an Everyman. He was without doubt Jewish in appearance, but with no literal data to go on, people envisage him personally, and this helps endear him to the individual. Is Jesus black? Of course! Is he white? Certainly! Is he Asian, Oriental, Arabic, Latino, Aboriginal or Native American in appearance? Yes... without a doubt... and that is how it should be! Nick Payne, Alcester, Warwickshire, UK

Jesus was of Jewish parentage and so was clearly of semitic appearance. For the Church artists of the miidle ages to depict him as a Jews when Jews were so despised, would have been unthinkable, hence the the Aryan look. Jon, London

I've never understood why people depicted Jesus and Mary as white, and Mary as a blonde! It seems obvious to me, given what part of the world they supposedly came from, that they would have had dark skin and hair. And yet artists so often seem to ignore this totally...it doesn't make sense to me. Esther, Cambridge

It does not matter what colour skin Jesus had,it was the man inside that mattered. Bernard Wighton, London

In my opinion, I think Jesus was black. From the perspective that he was brought to Africa when he was a baby and he did not appear to be odd. Also from the angle that he was a Jew and some Jews are black. Essentially is that there is no tribe on earth that is white in the real sense of the word white. Prince Peterson Odiase, Ekpoma, Edo State, Nigeria

Christianity is often seen as a "white man's religion" which we westerners have tried to shove down the throats of all and sundry who are "not like us". It's funny that its origins lie in the middle east with a bloke of questionable colour but definitely not white! Actually white people definitely fall into the category of gentiles (non-jews) - and it took a great debate to decide whether or not to invite gentiles into the church at all! And we're surprised when the African and Asian churches want to send missionaries to the UK! Bring them on - we've got a lot to learn! Dan O'Brien, Newquay, Cornwall

It's utterly disheartening to know that this is still something people debate. Really, does it matter? Why is colour relevant, does it somehow lessen or heighten the impact Jesus has had on the world if he's black? The sooner people give up on the notion that people can be divided by colour, the sooner we move a little closer to deserving our sense of self-importance. If we can't, then there's always the option of going back to living in the trees. Brendan Smith, Sheffield

And how many angels can dance on the head of a pin? Mike, Marquette US

Story from BBC NEWS:http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/1/hi/magazine/3958241.stmPublished: 2004/10/27 15:34:10 GMT© BBC MMVII

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